[Alcuin presses his hands over his mouth and shuts his eyes tightly. He's trying so hard to pull himself together but he can't manage to do more than slightly slow his breathing. The bedframe taps and rattles against the wall.]

Armin, oh gods Armin, I-I can't, I can't do this, I can't be what they need, I can't look for the dead I can't I can't I can't I can't--!

[He hunches forward with a tiny, desperate mewling sound. But his eyes open. He stares at Armin as if he could drag him across the miles by sheer willpower.]

Neria. Sera. Ambrose. Robin. Toby. Neeshka. You... Elua help me, I can't do this!