[Jaunt] That Monk is Terrifying

[failgoyle]

Okay, okay, so, everyone stay the hell away from Matthew. I don't know what the hell he's doing, but he's some kind of monk, and he's talking to ghosts, and he and the ghosts are freaking terrifying and tried to kill me! And he was gonna interrogate me with this scary as hell tree-lady-ghost-thing who wanted my blood, and I barely got out of there alive!

...and...uh...he kind of startled the crap out of me, so I...ah...lost my tail, and I...er, well...he's...still got it...

Comments

[failgoyle]

It...uh...

...it kind of took me a minute to remember I knew how to make portals, and I left through one of those.

[failgoyle]

Hobs. Hobgoblins.

...look, there's a bunch of talking animals back in there that are hungry, and I don't know what else they'd be. They seem hobgoblin-like enough.

So where is this booze, then?

[failgoyle]

They do. They really do. Then they don't know anything until it's too late. Way too late.

[Education had come with a terrible price...]

It grows back, so it's not too much of a pain in the ass, at least.

[He knows exactly what he's doing with that turn of phrase. Exactly.]

[leftbehindagain]

Probably spirit animals and whatnot that didn't get infiltrated along with their people. What do they look like?

It's in my storage, so I'll have to come and give it to you.

[tailforbrains]

Not for some universes, but in mine, yeah, it is. You get part-celestial people sometimes, too, but they get the pretty wings and the thing where people actually like having them around, instead of horns and a tail and people throwing rotten food at them.

And it's hells. Plural. There's like... multiple planes of it.

[capital_asset]

Or they think they can handle it.

[Even knowing better doesn't always help - not if you manage to gain their attention through no fault of your own. Raidou knows that from experience.

And yes, he is getting that impression from Jules' repetition of that particular turn of phrase. He's still going to ignore it, though.]

Good.

[failgoyle]

Oh, geez, there were a lot of them...a griffin-thing, and some kind of annoying bat...I lose track.

Would...would you mind doing that?

[failgoyle]

Yeah, I...think that's part of why no one can really see my horns and tail. Kind of some involuntary magical self-defense. But I've got wings!...they're just really small, and "pretty" isn't the word I'd use for those.

Multiple planes of...oh. That...doesn't sound like a really great place to visit.

[leftbehindagain]

...oh, no, Mr. Sparkles is unsupervised? [Better him than Zed unsupervised. ...probably. Doesn't really make it a less scary thought, though.] I suppose it's too much to hope there was a chirping moth around.

All right. Meet you there in five?

[tailforbrains]

It's not a great place to visit. I've never been there, and I never want to. I don't like demons. They're tricky, and mean.

I want to see you sometime! I bet you look interesting, at least.

[failgoyle]

That's even worse than not knowing better, really.

Come on, Raidou, it's funny! Funny turn of phrase! Worth a laugh...]

[capital_asset]

Yes.

[When you regularly deal with the likes of Mara, you learn to tune these sorts of things out.]

...Of course, sometimes all the precautions in the world don't matter.

[failgoyle]

Mr. who now?

And no, I didn't see any moths. Just a praying mantis.

Sure, sure! I'll be there.

[leftbehindagain]

Damn. [But he's not going to wave his concern about Minako all over the network.]

Mr. Sparkles is the bat. He's Zed-san's, and of the two he's the more responsible one, but that's not saying much.

[Action]

[And in five minutes' time, Naoki finds a quiet spot on the monastery grounds and slips into Liminal Space. He could have done without the whole cliffside thing, but he'll live. For the time being, he sticks to one of the boat-bridges.]

[failgoyle]

Yeah, yeah, that sounds pretty universal, I guess.

[He's kind of relieved she's not liking that sort of thing, actually.]

I bet you can, sometime! It's...I can't really turn off the Mask at will, but there's a sort of ritual thing I can perform to let one person see through it, but it gets complicated.

[failgoyle]

Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes you're just fated to get cosmically screwed over.

[failgoyle]

Wh--wait, wait, he's with that creepy as hell guy who rambles on about darkness? No, thanks.

[See: reasons Jules and Zed never exist in the same place, how very odd.]

[Action]
[He'll be waiting on Naoki, happily perched on the railing of one of those boat bridges. The heights don't faze him at all, odd for someone as generally terrified of the world as Jules. He's just giving Naoki a cheerful wave.]

[capital_asset]

Indeed.

[Titania and her equally predatory husband can go hang, as far as he's concerned.]

[leftbehindagain]

He's easily distracted by shiny objects. Just throw a disco ball or something at him and you'll be in good shape. ...Zed-san, that is, not Mr. Sparkles.

[Action]

[Naoki blinks at the guy's apparently sudden calm, but just shrugs.] Well, at least there's one thing in the world you're not completely terrified of. Which did you want, Ragnarok or Divine Wind?

[tailforbrains]

What do you mean, complicated?

[failgoyle]

Yeah, I like heights. They're comfortable.

And...I dunno, Divine Wind sounds less apocalyptic.

[leftbehindagain]

Well, that depends on the apocalypse, I'd think.

[After a moment, Naoki fishes the drink in question out of his hammerspace and hands it over. It's greenish, and minty, and lives up to its name - the faster he drinks, the stronger the breeze.]

[failgoyle]

I can't really control my Mask--it's like a layer of magic that makes me look like a normal human. And since it's Fae magic, getting someone to see through it means you've got to do a little ritual and stuff. Complicated.

[failgoyle]

Well, fewer Vikings with that one, then.

[He eagerly takes that drink.]

Thanks a million, man, I really need something to calm my nerves.

[leftbehindagain]

[This would be a bad time to point out that the Japanese rendering of the drink's name would be 'kamikaze,' wouldn't it, given what that usually means to Westerners...]

You're welcome.