we're tuning in for your regularly scheduled changeling screaming

[runs]

[Not long after the return to Liminal, in a timeframe better measured in minutes than anything else, Kitty starts broadcasting. It's quiet at first but quickly gets louder as she's clearly working herself into a fit, dropping any ability to filter from the network as she goes.]

sheshouldnotbehereSheShouldNotBeHere

SHE SHOULDNOTBEHEREsheshouldnotbehereSheShouldNotBeHere

SHESHOULDNOTBEHERENOT HERE

NONONONONONODREKDREKDREKDREKTECHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SHESHOULDNOTBEHERESHESHOULDNOTBEHERESHESHOULDNOT[...and so on.

(To those who'd actionspam at her instead of responding on the network, she's just standing rooted to the spot where she arrived, staring at a moose-sized dragon opposite of her, who seems to be rather unsure of how to help her, considering that she dodges every time the dragon tries to get closer, without ever moving away further. Her whole body is tense, her fingers curled, and those who can see through masks will notice that her whole body language resembles that of a thoroughly spooked cat.)]

Comments

[runs]

[There is a moment of calm, and it seems like she's calmed down, but when she responds the pause in her panic doesn't last.]

She SHOULD NOT BE HERE!

[triggerhappytraitor]

Why?

[[an he's trying to locate her now because while he's better at the network than he has been in the past.... this is very difficult to keep up with that level of panic]]

[runs]

[There is a moment of what kind of question is that even before she gives the very enlightening answer:] SHE SHOULD NOT BE HERE, she should be back HOME, nobody should be here, and now she's here and she wouldn't be here if I hadn't been THERE AND NOW SHE'S HERE AND SHE SHOULD NOT BE!

[She can be found fairly easily, the big dragon next to her is pretty visible.]

[triggerhappytraitor]

Kitty. Stop it.

[[there's a bit more irritation to the firmness of his tone this time and he's stopped in the middle of liminal to focus.]]

Regardless of what you think about this place, she is here. If it's your responsibility that she's Traveling now, then take responsibility for her and stop having a tantrum that things didn't go how you wanted them to.

[runs]

But I can't DO anything!

[She can't bring her back, she can't bring herself back how could she bring her back, and she's much to young and powerless to protect someone. Not that anyone could really protect her here.]

[triggerhappytraitor]

You can stop yelling and let her be at your side without you insisting that she shouldn't be.

[runs]

If she's here, she should be with me, but she shouldn't be here. [She feels like there's an important difference buried in there.

The dragon, meanwhile, figures that her not!dragonet has calmed down enough to trot closer and butt her head into Kitty's side, and she is right, as Kitty lets her and then leans against her neck, seeking the comfort that she refused before.]

[triggerhappytraitor]

It doesn't matter if she should or shouldn't be here. She is here. Saying she shouldn't be won't change that, nor will blaming yourself for something you couldn't control.

not that he's good at that second part himself

[runs]

[Kitty falls quiet, not because she's given up the argument, but because she wants to continue this conversation in person. The network is just too open.

...As is Liminal in general, probably, but that's a different issue that she cannot avoid.]

[triggerhappytraitor]

[[Back where he's standing, Tachibana lets out a deep breath before opening his eyes and refocusing on liminal. With Garren's help (Hummer form being rather helpful for zooming ahead and scouting) it doesn't take too long for him to find the pair and approach]]

[runs]

[Kitty looks up when Tachibana approaches and hides a bit against Cynthia's neck but crosses her arms at Tachibana anyway.]

Do you know a way to bring her back home?

[She still shouldn't have picked up anything, or at least not too much to effortlessly fit in back home. Kitty needs to believe that.]

[triggerhappytraitor]

I don't, no. You'd have to ask someone who's been Traveling a lot more than I have something like that.

[[He moves to sit down near by, not too close, but close enough, Garren fluttering to land on his shoulder, looking over with a worried chitter]]

[runs]

...I will.

[She's not moving, but she is relaxing a bit as time passes. Eventually she says:]

I hate this.

[triggerhappytraitor]

...Being here? Or that she joined you?

[[Since... he somewhat suspects that it's both.]]

[runs]

Both. All of it. I want to go home. I don't want her to be changed, too.

[triggerhappytraitor]

Changed?

[runs]

Everyone gets changed when they are in places like these and then they can't go home properly and it sucks.

[triggerhappytraitor]

People always change. It doesn't mean you can't go home again. You can think of it like going off to school,; you're somewhere different, with different people, learning new things. You'll be a different person when you go back home, but that doesn't mean people won't recognize you, or that you can't go back to how things were if you want to.

/hijacks

[breakaleginhalf]

[There's a distinct, pregnant silence.]

You really don't get what we all mean by changed, do you.

[triggerhappytraitor]

[[There's a bit of a pause.

And then he makes the connection Private Level II]]

You mean she's like you and Jules...?

[breakaleginhalf]

Yeah. It's just the three of us, as far as I know. Team Changeling.

Private Level II until otherwise stated

[triggerhappytraitor]

[[another small, awkward pause]]

...how can I help her?

[breakaleginhalf]

You can't.

What we are now? We're stuck like this. The Fair Folk take something from us, and we can't get that back. Because we don't know what They took. Some of us think it's our soul, or our memories. Our humanity.

[triggerhappytraitor]

That doesn't mean any of you are beyond help. Or that you can't still live like humans if you want to.

She's blaming herself for something she wasn't able to control and is afraid what happened to her will happen to her dragon companion. That can be helped.

[breakaleginhalf]

That's what we try to do. But we don't fit in anymore. You guys have no idea how it feels, knowing you'd be hunted down like a monster if you slip up, or having someone who cares about you touch you, and you know they can't see what you really are. They literally can't feel how you're not human. It can drive us insane.

Kitty's nine. She needs validation, not being told she can go back to how things were. Changelings don't get that option. We get replaced in our own lives - we have nothing to go back to.