synopsychic | (no subject)

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So, about that color scheme.

Thing one, it's been a while since I did a lightcycle pitch, so: Anyone want a shiny light-up bikebaton to call their own before we looks-like head back to the Grid? First three takers, I still wanna eat and sleep this Liminal. If it is the Grid there'll probably be plenty of the things around, and if not, you have a cool fold-up bike.

Thing two, if anyone wants some Grid 101 I'll do my best, but since I think the only more Arcanapalooza jaunt we've had was whatever the hell they were all doing in Questing Country... it's a bit of a trip. Also my overlay managed to miss most of the action, so I'd be up for other people filling the gaps.

Thing three... by process of elimination Mei's almost certainly up this round, and I'd at least like to know what the crap's going on. In the quite likely event I end up not myself, could someone do me a solid and de-infiltrate me? [She knows this is hard to arrange beforehand, but she'd rather try - then it's at least out there that she wants the thing done.]

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"Eren is a soldier. He approached me as such and I treated him as such."

It's an odd feeling, defending Eren's adulthood.

"Heated argument. Next time someone is trying to kill me and I am under the impression that I have been betrayed I will be sure to let them take my life. Thank you for that wisdom." Malik replied dryly.

"You are not so innocent either, despite what you have gotten others to believe of you. We are cut from similar cloths you and I. Except I do not make people love me and then believe they have to chose between me and another."

Edited 2018-05-04 18:42 (UTC)

Gone is the bland, bored courtier's mask from Delaunay's face.

"I have never claimed to be innocent," he replies, his tone dripping venom. "I have earned every name my detractors call me in the City of Elua and well do I know it. Well do I deserve it. But there are things that even I--" He sucks breath in through clenched teeth. "How dare you. You could at least do the courtesy to hate me for things that I have done. Even if it was in self-defense, you still used Interface in a way I find utterly repugnant.

"Elua's balls, man, do you have any idea what you've just accused me of?" He snorts dismissively. "I will do you the courtesy of believing that it was only ill-phrasing that makes it sound that you are accusing me of forcing or compelling love--but no amount of ill-phrasing can make your final accusation anything other than it is.

"I would never force anyone whose love that I am so fortunate to have been gifted to choose between myself and any other that they love, no matter how personally repugnant I find that other love. I would sooner give them up first. I have. Blessed Elua, what kind of man do you think I am?"

Malik is silent for a moment before sighing and dragging his hand over his face.

"I apologize. I believed you to be the sort of man who makes people like myself and those I grew up with." He said. "There is a great deal in common with Alcuin and myself at his age, and it is difficult to not draw parallels."

There is a long silence as Delaunay looks Malik over, assessing if he is sincere or not. Then the tense lines of his body relax and he leans back against his wall.

"There are many different masters who shape men such as we," he says. "I was fortunate that my primary teacher was a kindly one. I am sorry that your own was such a monster. As for Alcuin..."

He sighs and shakes his head. "I have ever tried to do my best for him, though I have failed him badly, time and again. I am sure I will fail him again, in time, but I cannot stop trying. His companionship is one of the few sweet things that remains to me. He has brightened my life since the day I brought him back to the City."

He pauses again for a brief moment, looking thoughtfully at Malik, before adding, "His early life was not a happy one. I do not know all the details. There is no one left to ask. A Cammaeline officer--a younger son of a cadet branch of a noble family--fathered him upon a young widow and refused to take responsibility when her late husband's people cast her out. Our commander, Prince Rolande, had the officer disciplined, arranged for a wet nurse for the coming babe, and pledged to see to its welfare. Six, nearly years later, I rode back to Trefail to keep Rolande's promise for him."

Delaunay meets Malik's eyes. "At the age of six, Alcuin was an outcast in his village. 'Twas not only that he was born out of wedlock, for such things do happen upon occasion. It was known that his mother had been cast out, that his father refused to acknowledge him, that his nurse was a Skaldi woman and he had learned the language of the raiders as his milk-tongue... couple that with his uncanny appearance and 'twas easy enough for the other children to use him as their scapegoat and the adults to see him as nothing but trouble.

"I think, mayhap, that I might have taken him back with me even if the Skaldi hadn't chose that day to raid. As it was, we were the only ones to escape Trefail's destruction with our lives and I thank Elua that I had brought Alcuin out to meet my horse when the screaming started."

Edited 2018-05-05 08:45 (UTC)

There's the barest hint of a sad smile at the story. "That... certainly at least half explains how my brother twists himself in acrobatics to meet the approval of those he views as more adult. I think he expects himself to be instantly perfect, even at things that take half a lifetime to master."

It made teaching him both easy and frustrating.

There are questions Malik has, mostly involving why the Prince hadn't brought Alcuin and the nurse to a fortress or elsewhere.

However, it seems more fair to offer insight in turn.

"Rashid was... complicated. I do not think he was a monster so much as he thought he was the only one capeable of putting an end to the wars. He did great things and he did terrible things, as any ruler of a soverign land does."

Delaunay nods. "I am all too familiar with that experience when it comes to teaching Alcuin," he says wryly. "And that is true enough for those who rule, though one wishes that the balance swings either to great or that deeds neither great nor terrible, but that sustain one's people, hold sway."

His tone suddenly becomes quite serious. "However, if your Rashid did force or compel love, then he is a monster. Such deeds in our land are blasphemy. Love as though wilt--it is what we are commanded to by the Blessed Elua and the framework for our entire religion. I am not a good man, Malik, but there are things I will not do. To force love is blasphemy. To force someone to give up their love is a sin. To force them to choose between loving you and another, a lesser version of the same sin.

"I don't think Maestro Leonardo ever realized that or I would have not become such a monster in his thoughts."

"He and those who came before him believed that for those of us who fought for them emotional attachment was a weakness." Malik shrugged. "It is a difficult thing to change when we are also demanded to remain impartial in our work. We are starting though, loving our sons and daughters is easiest. Learning the rest is difficult."

True, they still begin training young but that was a matter of practicality.

"Perhaps it would have given him a different opinion of you, perhaps not. There had been others before you who treated him poorly, beyond that it is not my place to say however."

"To teach you and your... order? Brotherhood? Guild?" Blessed Elua, let it be just this man and his fellows, let it not be his entire people. "To teach you to forgo love was a terrible act and one I am deeply sorry was committed against you."

There is sympathy in his voice and expression, amidst the muted horror.

"And yet... you may be better at love than you think. We are often not good judges of our own capacity for such. I have known a woman who would swear up and down that her kind lacked the capacity to love at all and yet by word and deed her love for the man she had chosen was far purer and sweeter than anything I am yet capable of."

He shakes his head. "But never mind that. If it will prove my intentions toward Alcuin and his lovers are pure, I would be willing to show you the memory of my single encounter with Maestro Leonardo, so long as I do not have to Interface it."

That got a chuckle from Malik. "I know exactly how foolish I am in my love. Our argument is not the stupidest thing I have engaged in when I get attached to someone."

That dubious honor either goes to begging immortality or facing down dungeon horrors to save a student from herself.

"My talents with psychic skills end in being able to share my senses, I am better at manipulating liminal matter and other magics. If you wish to share I will not stop you."

"Nor I," Delaunay admits, with a genuine smile. It changes his face. "And we are in luck, for my own talents lie within the network, although I am able now to create simple objects and soon hope to create foodstuffs. I will offer a connection between our minds. Take it, and I will push the memory through to you. 'Tis one of the easier Network abilities--all you need to know is how to share senses and review the archives--so if you ever wish to learn, you are halfway there. One moment."

The connection is offered up. You will have to forgive me, Delaunay thinks at him, but this will take as long to experience as the memory itself took to happen. I have yet to learn the trick of speeding them up.

And then, once Malik accepts the connection, the memory will play out between them, Malik experiencing the whole wretched thing as Delaunay-- no, as Anafiel once had.

When the memory ends, Anafiel looks exhausted--and every single year of his age. His voice is quiet, but steady, as he speaks. "I said, then, that I forgave him and when I did, I think I meant it. I still do forgive him for his imagined transgression of loving Alcuin, for in that there is nothing to forgive. There is never anything to forgive in loving someone or something, only betimes in the actions one takes in the name of that love.

"And yet, time made a liar of me. Dungeon-pent for a year, yet perfectly conscious of my previous time in liminal space, alone except for my thoughts and my living memories, I came to feel as though by urging the interface upon me, trusting I would take it as all knowledge is worth having, Leonardo had cut off all options for me but to grant him forgiveness. That such forgiveness, in fact, was a hollow one. I came to feel that he had manipulated me through the Interface, mayhap through the entire length of the conversation. And so I grew to resent Leonardo, for that manipulation, for those lost choices. For flooding my mind with his jealous fantasies. For showing me the vision of myself as a monstrous statue, so very like the man you accused me of being, intent on selfishly, sacrilegiously hiding Alcuin's brightness from all others.

"All that when I had come to Leonardo to tell him he did not need to fear I would take Alcuin from him! Indeed, I most heartily wished to give them my blessing, as I had for him and Thorne. And yes, I wanted to learn more of him, but that was because he was beloved of my boy. I wanted to like him, Malik. Indeed, there was even the half-formed thought that if I liked Leonardo well-enough, I would invite him to spend a night making Alcuin very happy with one of us on either side of him. And as distasteful as our meeting was, there was still a part of me that recognized that if we had met any other way, mayhap we might have been friends.

"It does not matter. I fell into a dungeon a few days after our encounter and when I emerged, Leonardo was gone. And I cannot let go of what he did to me, though the gods know I wish I could."

Edited 2018-05-05 23:29 (UTC)

Malik is dead silent afterwards, the faintest sizzle of static electricity starts in the air before an iron mask of calm goes over his features.

He knows he should say something, but getting a handle on the creeping rage first is more important. First though, is a hiss of what are somewhat easily identified as cursing in language that sounds vaguely greek in some of the pronunciations.

"Leonardo was not the one who manipulated the situation, and neither are you or Alcuin or myself." He said, voice tight and livid. "It was not me that Leonardo was referring to in your conversation. It is him that I am angry at in this, not you."

He paces away, mostly to give space between himself and Delaunay if he loses control but also because it has always been easier to think clearly when moving.

"There was.... a, and I use this term loosely, man who was once here that Leonardo knew from home. He had the terrible predisposition to think with the head closest to his anus as opposed to the one closest to his heart when it came to those around him."

"Ezio Auditore, I presume," Anafiel says, dryly, crossing his arms again in front of him. "He appeared in the vision of the statue, Alcuin said he and Leonardo knew each other from before, and I know Alcuin was passing fond of the man. I never met him."

"The very same." Malik nodded. "He was... of a similar social station to you, if I have read your and Alcuin's bearings correctly. I have a suspicion that he... rarely treated Leonardo as well as one should a friend, even if the depths of affection are not returned. Whether it was intentional or not is also entirely debateable, my few dealings with the man involved being treated as an idiot relic when I refused to stand idle in our situation."

"Oh, I am not so sure about that," Anafiel says with an odd grin. "I was still very much in disrepute in some quarters at my time of death, though I have been assured by those who lived to see it that I was declared a hero post-humously."

Then he sobers. "But Leonardo loved him dearly, it is quite clear. To love so unequally and to see that love ignore you in favor of the charms of your own lover--for it is quite obvious that was, at least, what Leonardo believed--must have been hell for the man. And Alcuin loves so easily. I do not think he had gone to bed with this man, Ezio, before I came here, but mayhap it does not matter."

"You could be wearing sackcloth shoveling a stable and those who know how to pay attention to such things would know you are no stable-hand." Malik replied with a note of gentle teasing.

It falls just as quickly as he shakes his head, sighing wearily. "I doubt it matters either, but if Ezio returns again and does not remember any of this? I will not hold a grudge against him. I do not hold the actions of an overlay against someone and it would be much the same thing."

"Mayhap. I have not tried to disguise what I am either." Then he shrugs. "I suppose if Leonardo came back, I would do the same--although I confess, it would be difficult not to wonder if it is a ploy to earn himself a new start."

He shakes his head. "Well and so. I think I can try better not to hate Leonardo and thus you as his surrogate, though I will never like Interface, nor approve of its use in combat. Do you think we can otherwise work together if needs must, Malik al-Sayf?"

"We have very little agency in this game we have been forced in to by our hosts, despite my attempt at changing that." Malik shrugged.

"I do not rule out any tool in my arsenal when it comes to dealing with enemies." he blinked. "But outside of a situation such as that of the Deepsinger creature, I have little cause to use Interface in a fight. Bearing that in mind, however, I agree that we can be allies in things. It is wiser, and the manners of it will likely appease the modern folk well enough.

"I do not think we need a written agreement however, that would be a bit excessive."

"Perhaps I ought to have better said 'a deception,'" Anafiel clarifies with a shrug. "And I agree, a written agreement would be far in excess. We are allies then. I have allied myself with far more objectionable people than you. And you are right, I think, that the implicit courtesy will calm those who would otherwise suspect us of sending each other to the Floor--and Alcuin, I think, will merely be relieved that we did not come to blows. And Thorne," he adds, pitching his voice so that it will carry, "that we did not destroy her theatre."

He waits some moments, as if listening for something. Then he shakes his head. "Either she is better at hiding or she is not here."

There's a very small smile at that. "My reaction would be the least of your worries if you put me in The Floor. I would be genuinely impressed, others would not be."

After all, Altair is his closest friend and likely take it far more poorly than Malik would himself.

"Though, if you wish a sparring partner or someone who can take a hit and will not take it personally feel free to ask. I heal quickly. If she is eavesdropping, she knows that I would be... upset with her for speaking of what was intended to be a private conversation."

He's not going to check with Eagle Vision if she is there, that would be being a bit too paranoid even for him.

"Ah, a question of some import before we part. How would you like me to address you? I do not customarily use titles."

"I would like that," Anafiel says. "I have done what I can to keep in practice without a regular sparring partner--for there are few here who fight with swords in any reasonable fashion and far too many whose blades are magic or technologic or powered by ninja vitality--but I would not turn down one if offered. Especially as I am to teach Alcuin the blade and I have no doubt he will pick up on it as quickly as anything else."

He had, after all, managed to slay two of their attackers the first time he'd picked up a sword. Pity that there'd been over a dozen.

"Delaunay will do fine, I should think. I never gained the title I was born to. My father disinherited me when I refused to marry and bear children. As for you, would you rather Malik or Al-Sayf?"

"My friend, Altair, is also a skilled swordsman if you wish another. There are a handful of us who prefer more traditional swordsmanship, your presence would be most welcome I think." Malik nods.

"I have taught Alcuin some combat, so he is likely more skilled at it than he once was. Malik is fine as well." He offered a polite nod, not quite a bow. "I am most often found in the library or through the double doors attached to the first floor if you wish to speak. This was... a good turn of things, Delaunay."

"I have talked with Altair over the Network a few times," Anafiel says. "He seems a good man. I would be quite pleased to spar with him. And I am glad you have taught Alcuin. One mistake of mine, which he quite rightfully threw back in my face, was never teaching Alcuin anything of combat.

"And yes," he adds. "'Twas a very good turn indeed."

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Re: Enjoy my bland face icons

holy shit malik how did you know the exact thing to say that would piss him off the most

he's very good at that

Congratulations on unlocking Alcuin's department of backstory?

What a wild ride

Re: What a wild ride

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Re: What a wild ride

1/2?

2/2 (also slightly nsfw because fucking d'angelines)

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